“Stop Trying to Heal Before You’re Honest”

“Stop Trying to Heal Before You’re Honest”

In today's spiritual and personal development world, the word healing has become almost cliché.

It’s everywhere—on every Instagram quote, in every workshop, on every coaching call. But here’s the truth most won’t tell you:

Healing doesn’t start with a sound bath or sage. It starts with radical honesty.

We’ve become so obsessed with healing that we’ve bypassed the one thing that actually initiates transformation: the truth.

Before healing can take place, you must face the uncomfortable reality that you might be the problem. Not because you're broken. But because the patterns in your life—especially in relationships—don’t just happen to you.

They are mirrors.

And most people skip this step entirely. They’re told:

“You don’t have to know what’s leaving your body. Just trust the process.”

But I don’t believe that.
In fact, I believe the opposite.
You must know what energy is leaving you—because if you don’t name it, feel it, and understand it, you’ll unconsciously invite it right back in.

So how do you uncover the “why” before healing begins?

Here are 3 powerful steps:

1. Get Still and Ask the Real Questions

Stop running. Stop numbing.
Sit with yourself and ask:

• What pattern keeps showing up in my life or relationships?

• What do I get out of staying the same?

• Where am I lying to myself?

This part requires courage. Most people won’t do this work because it strips away the ego and reveals the truth.

2. Own Your Role Without Shame

This isn’t about beating yourself up.
This is about responsibility. Owning your side of the street is what begins the real energetic release.

Say it out loud:
"I was the one who avoided the conversation."
"I chose the same partner in a different body again."
"I sabotaged my peace because I was afraid of being alone."

Truth clears the fog. And when the fog clears, healing can finally begin.

3. Feel It, Name It, Release It

You can't release what you haven't felt.
You can't feel what you haven't named.

When you become aware of the energy—whether it’s guilt, anger, shame, fear—you give it a face. And with that, you gain power over it.

• Journal it.

• Scream it into a pillow.

• Speak it in a safe space with someone who holds no judgment.

Awareness = access.
And access creates true transformation—not just surface-level “healing.”

Don’t chase healing like it’s a goal on a checklist.
Start with truth. Honesty. Ownership.
That’s the ground your healing grows from.

Mike

Danvers Wellness Center, Healer, Coach, Speaker

Shamanic Practitioner, Holistic Wellness Coach