Why So Many Men Feel Alone—And What We’re Doing About It

The Call to Brotherhood: Why Men Need Each Other Now More Than Ever

There comes a moment in a man’s life when he realizes that going it alone is no longer a sign of strength. For many, it comes quietly, on the edge of burnout, at the end of a bottle, in the middle of a fight they didn’t want to be in, or when they look in the mirror and don’t recognize the man staring back. In that moment, he senses a deeper hunger: not just to feel better, but to feel whole.

This is where men’s work begins.

What Is Men’s Work, Really?

Men’s work isn’t about fixing what’s broken. It’s about remembering what’s been buried. It’s about reclaiming the parts of ourselves we were told to hide: the grief, the fear, the rage, the tenderness. It’s about being witnessed in our truth and being challenged to live with more integrity, purpose, and presence.

At its core, men’s work is a return to brotherhood—a space where men come together not to compete, compare, or posture, but to support and challenge each other. A space where vulnerability is honored and accountability is sacred.

But let’s be honest: the path to brotherhood is one many men never walk.

The Brother Wound: Why So Many Men Avoid the Work

The reason? The brother wound.

The brother wound is the pain that comes from betrayal, abandonment, competition, and mockery by other men. It’s the childhood bullying, the sports team hazing, the locker room shame. It’s the feeling that other men are threats, not allies. That to be safe, you must be silent. That if you show weakness, you’ll be devoured.

This wound teaches men to isolate themselves emotionally, to rely on sarcasm instead of sincerity, and to measure their worth through domination or performance. It’s why so many men feel more comfortable opening up to a woman than to a group of men. And it’s why the hardest step for many men is walking through the door of their first men’s group.

I know this firsthand.

My Story: The Meeting I Almost Didn't Attend

The first time I planned to attend a men's group meeting at the Danvers Wellness Center, I couldn’t do it. I sat in my car filled with anxiety, shame, and doubt. I thought the men inside would judge me, laugh at me, see through me. I thought I had to prove something. To be strong, confident, stoic. I wasn’t ready. So I let the fear win. I didn’t go in.

But the shame of not showing up didn’t just disappear. It lingered. Gnawed at me. I realized that running from discomfort was exactly the pattern that kept me stuck in life.

So I made a decision.

I would walk into the next meeting. Shame and all.

And when I did, something unexpected happened.

I wasn’t met with judgment. I wasn’t met with cold stares or bravado.

I was met with presence.

I was met with men who looked me in the eye, who listened without trying to fix me, who nodded in knowing. These were men doing their work. Some further along, some just starting. But all committed.

Over time, that group became a lifeline. And now, years later, I co-lead that same men’s group. The very circle I almost walked away from has become the ground from which I stand taller, speak clearer, and live truer.

Wildman Brotherhood at Danvers Wellness Center

The Wildman Brotherhood, based at the Danvers Wellness Center, is more than just a group. It’s a modern-day rite of passage rooted in ancient truth.

Our ethos draws inspiration from the Brothers Grimm tale Iron John – the story of a boy who discovers a Wildman caged in the woods, a hairy and primal figure representing the unconscious masculine. When the boy releases the Wildman, he begins a journey into the unseen parts of himself, encountering trials, wounds, and transformations that awaken his mature masculinity.

We believe every man has a Wildman inside—not a savage or a brute, but a wise and grounded force of nature. A man who is no longer a slave to fear, shame, guilt, or rage. A man who reclaims his emotions, his instincts, his leadership.

The Wildman Brotherhood is where we meet him.

We don’t "call men out" with shame or superiority. We call them forward. We speak the truth, even when it's uncomfortable. We celebrate vulnerability as courage, not weakness. We believe that a healed man heals others—as a father, a husband, a friend, a leader.

What Happens in the Circle

In our meetings, men are invited to show up exactly as they are—confused, angry, numb, lost, alive, hopeful. We open with check-ins and grounding breathwork. We share real stories, not highlight reels. We challenge each other to take ownership, to examine our masks, to sit with our emotions instead of outsourcing them to our partners or addictions.

We do shadow work. We reclaim the body through movement and breath. We explore our edges with curiosity, not condemnation.

And we laugh. A lot. Because brotherhood is also joy.

Every man who walks through the doors feels that fear. But what he finds on the other side is something far more powerful:

Belonging.

Not because of what he does. But because of who he is.

Why This Work Matters

We are living in a time of great reckoning. The old models of masculinity are cracking under the weight of silence and suppression. Men are dying from loneliness, addiction, depression, and emotional isolation. Our relationships are strained. Our bodies are tense. Our hearts are walled off.

Men’s work is the antidote.

It is the path to presence. To healing. To purpose.

It gives a man the tools to feel without falling apart. To lead without dominating. To connect without losing himself. It teaches him that he doesn’t have to carry everything alone. And that strength isn’t about having all the answers, but the courage to ask the right questions.

A Call to You

If you’ve been thinking about joining a men’s group but haven’t taken that first step, let this be your nudge. Not because you’re broken. But because you’re ready.

Ready to grow. Ready to let go of what no longer serves. Ready to become the man your future is waiting on.

Yes, it’s scary. Yes, it’s vulnerable. But no man who has walked through the door has ever regretted it.

We’ll meet you where you’re at. We’ll call you forward. We’ll walk beside you.

Because men don’t heal alone. They heal together.

Wildman Brotherhood meets once a month at the Danvers Wellness Center on the second Wednesday of the month. Your first meeting is complimentary at the Danvers Wellness Center is complimentary. We want to make sure you're a great fit for the brotherhood and that this space feels right for you. If you are interested to learn more, please fill out the form at the bottom of this page and Matt or Mike will contact you shortly. [Click here]

We also host a meeting once a month at Circles of Wisdom in Methuen, MA on the third Thursday of the month. This meeting offers a hybrid option, you may attend online or in-person. [Click here] to sign up.

We offer breathwork, somatic practices, shadow work, and real conversations rooted in personal growth and emotional sovereignty. If you're ready to find your tribe, reclaim your power, and meet your Wildman, we invite you to join us.

The door is open. Walk through it.